I MISS HOME DEPOT: The Humor and Hassles of Expat Life in the Philippines and Auditioning Adobe’s Audio Aptitude

Have you ever felt the thrill of starting anew in a foreign land, only to stumble over the day-to-day quirks that remind you you're not in Kansas anymore? That's the heart of our latest episode – a personal journal entry meets tech talk where I lay bare the complexities of expatriate life in the Philippines, contrasted sharply with the comforts of home in the States. The techie in you will also get a taste of my venture into Adobe Audition, a stark leap from GarageBand's simplicity – and I'm all ears for your thoughts on the shift in audio quality.

Navigating the nuances of a new culture can throw you curveballs, and oh, do I have some stories to share. From pondering over the practicalities of maintaining a home here, like wrestling with a stubborn water filtration system, to the local custom of the "tabo" in the absence of hot showers, every day is an unexpected lesson in adaptability. And let's not forget the comical, yet frustrating, scavenger hunt for that elusive electrical plug – a true test of patience when language barriers turn a simple shopping trip into a wild goose chase.

Wrapping up, this episode is an invitation extended to the dreamers considering a life less ordinary in a third-world country. It's an open call for your burning questions and a candid look at what you might be signing up for, with the Philippines as our backdrop. And for my fellow audiophiles, your critique on our new podcast setup is the lifeline I need – is the change music to your ears, or should we jam with GarageBand a while longer? Stay tuned, and as always, your participation is the compass that guides this journey.

Transcript

Speaker 1: 0:19

It is days like today I fucking hate living here in the Philippines. Most of the time I love it and, given my situation, everything it's great, it's wonderful. You know, I can't, I really can't complain, even though I still find a way to complain, but it's just days like today. It just irks me. And it's days like today that I miss living in the States, and I'll talk more about it in a little bit.

Speaker 1: 0:56

You are listening to the objective, jerk, and I am said jerk, how's everybody doing? I listened to my last podcast and, yeah, me drinking coffee was annoying. At least it was annoying to me. I mean, the first time I think it was funny, but then it was like I kept. I'm like I don't know, but I don't know, some people like that stuff.

Speaker 1: 1:28

But the reason I'm recording this actually is just I'm playing with the audition, the Adobe audition. I kind of need like I don't know. It's like I really want to try and make, make it work and not use GarageBand. But GarageBand is so easy, I don't know. I might go back, it's just, you know, on GarageBand and maybe you can hear, but I haven't figured it out yet, or at least not that I can see, but on GarageBand, I would you know, I did like a podcast. I set everything up, I recorded it, I saved it and then every time I record a podcast I would just open up that file, delete the previous audio and then record my podcast and then have all the same settings and presets and stuff like that. But audition like it doesn't really. I mean, it has a little bit, but a lot of the stuff you have to do after, which is kind of annoying. So I don't know, I don't know, I don't know Somebody that's listening to this. If you hear this and you listen and you can tell different, like older podcasts sound worse or the same or better, let me know. But to me I think it sounds better and I think I'll be able to make it sound better.

Speaker 1: 3:07

I just I don't know. So I'm recording this and then I'm going to play with some of the things that you can play with. I got to get like instructions and stuff because this thing is just not user friendly. Like you know, garageband if you know how to work a computer, you can figure it out. You just click on a few things and highlight some stuff and oh, okay, this is. You know, it's pretty easy to use. That's what they call user friendly. Right, you can figure it out. You don't need to have instructions and stuff like that.

Speaker 1: 3:37

But audition, it's like it's just getting to the point of where my brain doesn't, you know, work that well. Like you know, it's Adobe, so it's a lot like Illustrator and Photoshop. It's set up the same, but still there's like a lot of stuff that I just what the hell is this and I'm clicking on? I don't know if it's working, I don't know. It's just, it's just a lot to I don't know. I mean, I guess I had to go through the same thing with GarageBand, but it was so much easier, though.

Speaker 1: 4:08

I mean, I, you know, I recorded one podcast and I had it figured out, so, but I'm going to give this a go. I'm going to, well, obviously, I'm recording this podcast and then I will work some magic, see how it turns out and kind of go from there. I just have to. I just have to do it. I just have to make sure I record another podcast, like within a few days and not two weeks, and then I'll forget everything I did, because I can't save everything, which kind of sucks, I don't know. I'm going to try it. I'm hoping I can make some adjustments and then save it and it'll keep all of that, but I don't know. From what I read that's not possible, but I would think that it would. I don't know, we'll see.

Speaker 1: 4:56

Anyway, I'm recording this and I'm trying to, you know, get some stuff done around the house. So here's. So this is. This is why I hate the Philippines today. Let's see, let's see, let's see. Well worden, just for a little context.

Speaker 1: 5:21

So where I live, we use well water and it's very hard water. It's got all the crap in it because it's the well and we're by the ocean, so there's lots of minerals and everything in the water. I've talked about it before, which is fine. Where I lived in Utah, they had hard water, but then we had a water softener and everything, which is something I desperately need to get, because I'm just getting tired of having to replace water lines and faucets and spickets and all this kind of crap every like six months or for sure every year.

Speaker 1: 5:58

It's like every year I go through stuff not working, plugging up, deteriorating. I've talked about like the sink that's probably totally crumbled and probably, like in another year, I'm going to have to buy another one. You know what I mean. It just eats up everything. It doesn't last longer, or PVC kind of stuff. But again, stuff plugs up. My washer gets plugged every once in a while, just there's so much crap in the water. So I need to get a water softener and a better filter. I do have a filtration system, but it's pretty basic. It's got like three little things and the filters and it's like I got to change them out realistically like every two weeks for it to be, and I only I do it once a month, month and a half, which is not enough. So I need a bigger, better water filtration system with a water softener that right there alone. It's going to cost a lot, but it's going to make things a little easier as far as crap I'm dealing with. Okay, so there's that.

Speaker 1: 7:04

So the other thing is here in the Philippines the average individual does not have a water heater, so they they bathe a lot of them, just what they call tabu, which I've talked about before, it's just basically pailing. You know, even if, even if people have showers, they'll still do the tabu thing. I don't know, tabu it's not tabu, it's tabu. I don't know. I'm saying it wrong a little bit, I feel like. Anyway. So you know there's lots of jokes or there's like during the winter time, which is now here, which is still not cold, but you know, in the early morning when you're taking a shower, the water, you know, even though it's really not that cold for people, you know, in the West or something, it's still kind of cold here, you know. So people will heat up their water and everything.

Speaker 1: 7:57

So so what they have here, I mean you can get like a water heater, like what you would in America. When you say water heater, you picture the big 50 gallon water heater that fills up with water, and you know what I mean. Here they don't have those. I think they have some smaller ones, but it's not really. It's not, it's not common. So I mean having a water heater. So I mean basically no water. Having no water heater is more common than anything else.

Speaker 1: 8:30

And then and then you go up to kind of like what what we have now? So each, each shower wherever you want, you know hot water. So even if you want it, like in your kitchen sink, so like I don't have hot water in my kitchen, the faucet and stuff like that, you know I could if I want to, I guess. But so right now we have three bathrooms. We only use two of them really, because we're still. The third one is like we built it but it's not complete, but anyway. So in the two bathrooms that we use that we use showers.

Speaker 1: 9:02

For trying to look at the camera, there's like a little hot water panel thing. Maybe I'll try and get a picture of it. I'll see if I do that for a member and I'll put a picture up on the thing, but it's, you know, it's basically like I don't know how to describe it. Really I'm trying to think of like what in the States? It's not very big. It's like you know the size of like a PlayStation or something, playstation three or something to. It's about that size, roughly that thick, you know. So it's like I mean you can get them kind of bigger, I think. And then, but like ours is like you know a foot and six inches by a foot or something maybe, and you basically just mounted on the wall by your shower and the waterline goes to that, and then you have your shower or you know your thought your showerhead comes from that, so it only turns on when you use it, which is kind of nice, because then you don't have.

Speaker 1: 10:08

You know, like a water heater in the States during the winter, especially during the winter, you know it's constantly running to keep the water hot. So this, you know it goes through and as soon as water starts flowing through it, the little water heater will kick on and you can adjust, you know, how hot you want it. It can only be so hot because it doesn't hold the water. You know, because for maybe like a second, like I don't know how it really works, I think it holds the water, like it heats it up and then lets it go. You know. So it kind of it's like a quick, kind of like a like a cure egg type system. I think I picked up my slurp, I saw it, so I'm going to see if Justin's going to Justin might my, my levels and stuff like that will kind of limit that. Anyway, so that's what we have, thank you.

Speaker 1: 11:06

So I bought one when we first got here, because I was like man, not when we first got here, but not long after we got here it was like I don't need hot water, but it's nice to have the warm water to, kind of it's nice to have a hot shower occasionally. So we bought it and I installed it. And when I installed it I installed it pretty much. You know how you're supposed to like I use the plug, the pigtail, whatever you want to call it. I wired it in there, like you're supposed to Nothing's grounded. So the ground I think I wired it to just nothing. But it was like so it's not technically grounded, they don't ground stuff. I mean I guess they kind of do, because I mean houses are grounded because it's all concrete and rebar and everything inside, but anyway. So I wired mine differently than the one that's in my bathroom.

Speaker 1: 12:15

So we had, we had, I guess, some plumbers, I don't know some guys that that come in. I can't remember why they were here. They're having problems with our water and I had the water heater and I hadn't put it in yet. So I asked them. I was like, hey, can you guys put this in? And they did it really quick. But they put a. They used a different plug, which I don't know where they got the plug. It's a different plug. Like you know, typical plugs have like the two prongs and they're flat, but like you know, in Europe they're round, they look like little penises or whatever. Here they have both and it's kind of annoying, but so they had they. They put in one that has that kind of prong and you know, and we haven't had problems, like you turn it on, it comes on. You know there's no issues.

Speaker 1: 13:06

But I've been like battling with the one in my kids bathroom, like all all. Like all the outlets and light switches need to be replaced. You know they're getting older, so I've been replacing some here and there, and those were some of the first ones I did. So it's like I was having problems with our water heater and stuff in our bathroom because there's an outlet in the shower up above which seems weird. But um, so I replaced that and ever since I did that I haven't had problems with our water here. So the water heater and the kids bathroom wasn't working right and so the kids are using our bathroom, which is annoying. So then, finally, I put a new outlet and it seemed to work and all of a sudden they're like it's not working. And then clean out the system, do whatever. It's like I can tinker with it and get it to work and it'll work. But then the kids come back and they're like it's not working. So then they're back to using my shower.

Speaker 1: 14:07

So I've been messing with this thing for months now, kind of going back and forth, cause you know, I get lazy or I get in my moods, which I'm kind of in like I'm in my shit mood, like my irritable, depressed kind of mood. I don't want to be around anybody or nothing like that. But I want to get some stuff done, which is not ever good, because then I just get more pissed off when shit like today, shit doesn't work, I'm about to sneeze. Ah, I get stoned, gross, all right. Um, so doing the various things, I like it was over. Oh, so I forgot to kind of mention this too, like before.

Speaker 1: 15:00

Um, like I said, the plug wouldn't fit the original outlet and so you had to have a little adapter thing so like an ours, like that thing was getting really hot and it kind of melted the adapter. So I was thinking that was kind of part of the issues and why I'm place the outlet. That fixed a lot of it. And then they had the same kind of problem with theirs. But they're, the plug kind of, you know, would get so hot that it kind of melted. Because they do, instead of doing an outlet like portrait wise, they do it landscape here, I don't know why. So when you plug stuff in, it's like it doesn't, it just doesn't work right. I don't think I know, it's just kind of annoying. Another little thing that annoys me about here it's like I think you're lucky enough to take a job.

Speaker 1: 15:51

That was the last thing I did. You know, their plug got a little hot, so the little prongs that stick out of the plug, one was kind of bent, or it got too hot so it kind of melted and it didn't line up right. So it was funky right. So I was like, okay, I need to replace the plug. And I was going to replace it with the type of plug that's on our water heater because you know, I haven't had any problems with it, you know, but I still had the one that came with this water, our water heater. So, like I said, I had other people install the water heater and I have no idea why, but they didn't use the plug that came with it. They used this other plug and I don't know if it's because they know that you're going to have problems, like I did with mine. I'm guessing that's what it was. So I was like, okay, I'm going to go.

Speaker 1: 16:48

So I put the original style plug. I even opened up ours to look and see how they wired it. And they kind of wired it just like I don't know, kind of like what you would say half assed, I guess. But it works. You know, I have any problems with ours. So I was like, okay, I'm going to do how they did it. So I did that. I put the plug on. It seemed to work. And then again it's not wanting to come on, it's not working. So I'm just like man, what the crap? So I'm just getting tired of it. So today, what my plan was I'm going to find a plug that's just like the one that they use on ours and install that and hopefully that kind of fixes everything.

Speaker 1: 17:31

Well, that is easier said than done. So in the States, right, you have Lowe's and Home Depot and then if you need to go and get something that's more industrial, whatever, you can go to. There's some stores and whatever. But basically you can go to Home Depot and find whatever you need, right, they have everything there, and if they don't have the thing you're thinking of, they have something else. That's pretty close, or it'll work or whatever. Right, you know, in the States you go to Home Depot. You walk in.

Speaker 1: 18:09

You know, I used to. I used to have like a project in my head or something, something I was working on and I'm like I need to do. I need to make A and C work, but I don't know how to. I need to find something to make it work. So I need to find a B to make A and C work together. Right, and I'm not, you know, whatever it is I'm working on, I'm not an expert, so it's like I have to. You know, I'd go to Home Depot to find what would work. You know, go into the whatever I'm working on, going that you know, plumbing or electrical whatever and sit there and just look through all the crap they have and be like, oh crap, what is that? Okay, oh, this will work. Okay, that's probably what this is for. Cool, or you know, make something work out of nothing, or you know what I'm saying. So you can. You can kind of make your own contraption if you need to. You know.

Speaker 1: 19:06

So here, when you go to a hardware store except for the big one, they do have a big one that's kind of like Lowe's and Home Depot. It's called WilCon, but that one's kind of far. So they have lots of hardware stores like all over the place. It's kind of weird and it's kind of annoying. It's the Monpa stores, but they all have the same shit, which is kind of annoying.

Speaker 1: 19:32

It's like you know, it's like you would think if you have a hardware store and you have all this stuff and then there's a hardware store down the road and they all have the same stuff, you would try and be like you know what? What can I? What can I do to get more business here and maybe have a little more variety or whatever? I don't know, but it's most of the stuff they have is crap. It's like Chinese made just crap and then whatever is pretty good. You can't just go in there and look around because of you know they have problems with, you know, theft and stuff like that.

Speaker 1: 20:10

So you go there and somebody meets you. What do you need? Well, you know, and sometimes it's like, well, I'm trying to do this and do this and they don't. You know, it's like you know, sometimes like I don't know what I need. I'm looking for something to make it work, and this was one of the things I learned when I first got here. You know, but, um, I don't know what I need.

Speaker 1: 20:32

But on top of that, most of the people I'm dealing with, they don't really speak English very well and, to be fair, if even if I spoke Ilocano it would, I still wouldn't be able to explain, because there is no. That's the biggest thing I think I've learned living here, you know, because they say, like English, english is the hardest language to learn because there's so many, there's just so much to it, right? And then you have like Spanish or what it, or even Filipino and Ilocano. That it's like it's more direct, what the thing is, you lose a lot of details in that directness.

Speaker 1: 21:12

So it's like, instead of, instead of going, you know, to the hardware store and saying, hey, I need, like in the States, you'd be like, I need like a pigtail, is what you would call it, kind of like a, you know, a dryer pigtails, what they call a dryer I need. That's basically what I needed today, except it's not for a dryer. So I needed a plug that had, like, you know, a two foot cord or a meter long cord that was open on the other end so I can wire it to the water heater. So that's what I needed, right? So if I went to Home Depot in the States and said exactly, that guy would be like okay, I know what you need and they can, you know, go in through. Fine here. But here, if I say that they don't know what the fuck I'm talking about, but even if I just say in a little con, I'll just say plug, then they're like oh, you plug? No, you know what I mean. No, I need a plug with the court. Oh, you want an extension court? No, not extension court.

Speaker 1: 22:06

So it's like it doesn't, it doesn't matter, even if I can speak a little con. It's like so you have to go through this whole thing. And I'm trying to explain to this person and I'm already, like I said, in the shit mood, I'm irritable, and so it's like I'm kind of getting short with her and I'm like hey, I'm not mad at you, just so you know, I'm just irritated. So it's like she gets a plug. I'm like no, I need this. No, this, no, I need, I need you know, I'll sit there and explain. I'll explain like five different ways, but the same thing. Oh, we don't have Sorry. It's like okay.

Speaker 1: 22:36

So then I go to another hardware store. They don't have it because they all have the same shit. And then I went to a specialty store that's like a little more industrial equipment kind of stuff, and I was thinking maybe they'd have it there. They don't have it. So after that I was just like what the fuck man? And it just it just pisses me off when it's like, okay, I have, I have a set of things that I'm going to do. You know, I had that water heater, I had this thing that I'm doing right now for the podcast, and then I'm going to kind of clean up this area because there's like paperwork and stuff starting to build up and I want to kind of clean and organize my room a little. So I have like some tasks that I want to do. But when going to the hardware store in the States, yeah, you're driving further because everything's further apart.

Speaker 1: 23:23

But, dude, I could go to Lowe's and get what I need and come back quickly here. It's like going to five different places. No one knows what I'm talking about. I didn't even get what I wanted to get. I ended up getting another kind of adapter that just sit differently. So I think the plug will sit better. I don't know, we'll see if it works. I don't even know. I mean like I was able to get it on, but I always do, and it comes on, okay, seems like it's working. It's been sitting there for a while. So tomorrow morning when the kids go to use the shower, it's not going to be working again. It's just like. It's just. It's just, it's just fucking annoying. And and then, plus, it's like on top of it. That's the other thing too.

Speaker 1: 24:08

This is another reason why I don't like going out anywhere. I mean, I don't, it's just, everybody just like stares at you and it's just dude, I I think I've said it before, I know I've said it before, but I there's no way, there's no fucking way that I could be a famous person. There's no way. It would drive me absolutely insane. I could not do it. There's no way, where everybody knows what you look like and you know what I mean, like just to go, because here that's what it's like. So I, I, I know it's like to be a famous person, except nobody's asking me well, I don't make the money that a famous person does and no one's asking for my autograph.

Speaker 1: 24:54

Other than that, it's like everywhere I go, oh, oh, oh, oh. People, oh my gosh, they're all like shy and scared to talk to me or do this, and they laugh and they giggle and they all stare and it's just like. It's just. I know it doesn't, it doesn't really. If it's not like, it's like really, but it's just, I don't know, it's just annoying. It's like dude, I've been here four years. You know, I don't, I don't know, it just gets annoying.

Speaker 1: 25:25

So that's one of the other reasons why I don't ever go anywhere hardly, and I hate, see that, and that's why I don't do stuff. So when I'm in my shit moods, kind of like I am now, I don't I'm not like in my really deep depression, shit mood, but but that's why I don't go any, because it just I just get so fucking annoyed because when I'm in my shit mood, every little thing just fucking pisses me off more and more and more and more until I get fucking irate and jump off the handle. Fly off the handle. You know what I mean. So that's why I don't go anywhere, because it's like just driving anywhere is just insane, because they're the shittiest drivers on the planet. I swear to God. I've talked about it before, but it's like it just annoys me.

Speaker 1: 26:17

Anyway, that's that's all I wanted to say. I'm about at my time. I wanted to check. This was just a test run anyway, but I don't even know if I'll post this one. I probably will, cause I've been really sucking at posting my podcast or doing them anyway. I used to do it like every few days and now it's like every two weeks, but so that's it. It's great in here, but it also sucks.

Speaker 1: 26:44

He's got some questions regarding living over in a third world country. I think a lot of countries are probably similar to the Philippines. I mean, there's no place like the Philippines, I don't think, but there's places that are similar. So if anybody's looking to move abroad or something like that, hit me up, let me know, ask me some questions and that's it. And also let me know about the. You know the sound difference of it, if it is making a difference at all. If you can't even tell and I'm like wasting my time I'll just go back to GarageBand, but that's it. I appreciate your time. Thanks for listening and I will see you next time. Bye-bye.